A resident of rural India refers to any person from his village as a ‘brother’, a relation as sacred as one’s own brother. On the contrary an urban Indian will refer to his parents as his ‘extended/ joint-family’, since ‘family’ is defined as husband-wife and children! Thankfully two thirds of India are still rural. This vast chasm in attitudes is evidently disturbing to many of us old-fashioned adults. We have been seeing the tidal waves of change for more than two decades, with the turn of the millennium.  

The role of art and culture in promoting loneliness

A 2007 blockbuster Bollywood film made headlines with a favorite dialogue among the young girls ‘I am my most favorite person. I love myself!’ This national sentiment among young adults about ‘self-love’ was the start of a dangerous trend.

Another dent to the social fabric was the ‘selfie’ culture when smart phones came in. The alien concepts of ‘privacy’, ‘my mobile’, ‘my life’ ‘who are you to advise me’, ‘locking their bedroom doors’, ‘parents better knock before entering’, ‘extra sensitive to critical advice’, ‘I will decide what to do’, ‘America has a helpline number 911, why can’t we’, ‘ learn how to set boundaries’ and a host of such attitudes started invading the Indian psyche.

This growing self-centered behavior is bound to lead to loneliness. Breaking of the joint family, shrinking of the nuclear family, working mothers, loss of the original community in urban areas, is leading to social dis-connection and alienation. Each person is becoming a law by themselves as they decide how, what and whom they will follow. The utter disregard of social norms, relationships, elders, religion, rituals, morality is shocking. Everything sacred is being socially challenged. Each person is becoming an island, in themselves.

COVID-19 and the loneliness epidemic

The two-year-long COVID-19 lockdown and the shift to online classes changed the habits of children as well as adults as they became more home-bound and comfortable in their cocoon. ‘I don’t feel like meeting and going out’. This cocooning of people furthered the social disconnect.

To address the growing disconnect, Dr. Vivek H. Murthy, Surgeon General of United States, issued an advisory on ‘Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation’ in 2023, which called attention to urgent action for improving the lives of people by increasing social connection. By declaring it a public health challenge, he formulated a national strategy with recommendations.  Psychologist Jonathan Haidt in his best seller book ‘The Anxious Generation’ 2024, says ‘The arrival of the smartphone changed life for everyone after its introduction in 2007. Like radio and television before it, the smartphone swept the nation and the world. It’s the Great Rewiring of Childhood that is causing the Epidemic of Mental Illnesses, including social disconnection’.

Why Asian countries can tackle loneliness?

Asia is still focused on maintaining the family system and gives importance to holding it together. Indra Nooyi the celebrated ex-CEO of Pepsi Cola, in one of her interviews, makes a very pertinent statement “families will always be messy,” she says, but “the beauty lies in keeping it intact in spite of that!” If people understand this – that keeping the family together is imperative even though it is not perfect, life will be better. We must promote tolerance, acceptance, compassion, empathy, kindness and good values to keep people together. Despite differences between people, beauty lies in the various hues of the rainbow. We want unity in diversity.

Jean Twenge and Jonathan Haidt in a study analyzed responses of thousands of 15- year- old across 37 participating countries and stated that ‘through 2012, reports of feeling lonely and friendless at school increased in all regions except for Asia’! 

The role of volunteerism in addressing loneliness!

The growing loneliness epidemic has quietly become one of the most pressing social challenges of our time, affecting people across age groups and communities. However, volunteerism offers a powerful antidote. By engaging in service, individuals step out of isolation and into circles of purpose, compassion, and connection. Every act of volunteering, whether mentoring a child, organizing a community drive, or simply showing up for a local initiative—creates opportunities for meaningful human interaction. These shared experiences foster belonging, mutual respect, and friendships that extend far beyond the immediate task at hand.

International volunteering organizations, such as Rotary, has long believed that service above self not only uplifts communities but also enriches the lives of those who give their time and energy. In working together to address local and global challenges, Rotary members and volunteers alike build support networks that counter the isolation so many silently endure. Volunteerism doesn’t just fill social gaps; it strengthens the very fabric of society, reminding us that connection, empathy, and shared purpose are the best safeguards against loneliness.